Brickleberry – Head Ranger Ethel
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Brickleberry – Head Ranger Ethel

August 28, 2019


– PRE-SCHOOL FIELD TRIP,
AND NOT A SINGLE FATALITY? OH, HOW REFRESHING.
JUST DOING MY JOB. HEAD RANGER ETHEL,
OVER AND OUT. [sighs]
GOOD JOB, ETHEL. OH, THANK YOU, ETHEL. – CONNIE, I NEED YOUR HELP. WOODY’S GIRLFRIEND
IS BAT-SHIT CRAZY. – SHE SEEMED NICE TO ME.
MAYBE YOU’RE JUST JEALOUS. – YEAH,
AND MAYBE YOU’RE JUST– UGH, I DON’T EVEN HAVE
THE ENERGY TO INSULT YOU. JUST STEP ON A SCALE.
– HEY! WHERE’S ALL THE DANISH?
IT’S BEAR CLAW WEDNESDAY! – NOW IT’S FRESH FRUIT
WEDNESDAY. – [spits] UGH! THIS DOESN’T TASTE
ANYTHING LIKE A DONUT! I HATE IT! [grunts] – HEY, I DIDN’T GET
TO EAT YET! UH, BUT IT’S OKAY. MY MOTTO IS
“EFFICIENCY THROUGH POSITIVITY.” BY WORKING TOGETHER,
WE CAN ACHIEVE GREATNESS. [phone ringing] SORRY,
PROBABLY REALLY IMPORTANT. BRICKLEBERRY NATIONAL PARK.
HEAD RANGER ETHEL SPEAKING. THE PARK EXPENSE REPORTS
ARE LATE? WE HAVE THOSE?
I’LL GET RIGHT ON THAT. [beep]
SORRY, CAN YOU HOLD? HELLO,
HEAD RANGER ETH– WHAT DO YOU MEAN
THE LAKE’S ON FIRE? [phone ringing]
OH, MY GOD, HOLD ON. – ETHEL, I CAN’T COME
TO WORK TODAY, I’M SICK. – DENZEL, I NEED YOU HERE.
HEY, ARE YOU ON YOUR JET PACK? [phone ringing]
– NO. – HEY, LOOK,
IT’S A FLYING BLACK GUY! – MAYBE.
[phones ringing] – CALM DOWN.
A BADGER ATE YOUR BABY’S FACE? [beeping and ringing]
HOLD ON. MY EMERGENCY SCANNER’S
GOING OFF! THIS IS ETHEL!
WHAT’S YOUR EMERGENCY? – ETHEL, IT’S STEVE. DID YOU KNOW THAT CONNIE
IS AFRAID OF RAW FISH? – WHAT? – [screaming]

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