FIGHT ME PEASANT | Clone Drone #3
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FIGHT ME PEASANT | Clone Drone #3

August 29, 2019


*wapish* Top of the mornin’ to ya laddies, My name is Jacksepticeye And welcome back to “Clone Drone in the Danger Zone”! Uh, they upgraded the game recently. They sent me a link to it and there’s a bunch of new stuff in it. There’s an improved kick, there’s improved arrow abilities, a bunch of different things. And Endless Mode now has some different levels and new enemies in it so, I wanna try that out because I like this game… [announcer robot] Therese Mullen Age: Seventy eight. Favorite color: Grey Oh, God. I’m so boring lookin’ [mimics robot announcer] They don’t call it endless mode for nothing Okay. So the first few levels of this Should be pretty simples…. Oh- ‘Kay… God Almighty I do not remember the first level of this Having so many enemies already Who’s still alive?? It can’t be you ’cause your fucking legs are falling over Is it you? No Which one of you is still alive? I think it might be you Is one of these still alive? There’s somebody fall down and I just can’t see them Aahh there we go, there’s two dudes!
[Laughing] Oakie-smokie day Come here!!! It’s like fuckin’ ring-around-the-rosie I want to get all the new upgrades! Yeah!! Shut up you sons of bitches-Shut up! I can do this really well I’ve got pretty damn good at this I wanna get my bow immediately There’s a new upgrade for the bow apparently that has…. Time slow down power, so when you aim time slows down to give you just a little bit of a second to work on your stuff. I should be able to do it How far did I get into this last time? ‘Cause I did try endless mode before right? I can’t remember where I got to WOOSH!!! Okay, Imma just go in here… And you guys can all die by the saw blade if you want There we go, Everybody die by them. [Laughs] So I don’t actually have to put in any work [Jack screams] DEATH! Ooohhhh YES! [Jack screams] JESUS! JESUS! Come here! Nice! [mimics arena voice] Victory Why aren’t the saw blades still going? Okay. Now they’ve stopped I still want to know if I can touch the saw blades after they’ve stopped and if they’ll destroy me cause I hope they don’t but I still want to touch them-I don’t know why [responding to robot announcer]
Oh I will [mimicking robot announcer]
we don’t have all day Um.. I probably should be getting clones, like, immediately but, I figure if I just get lots of arrows then that’ll work. I want to get the kick power as well Cause they did say that that was improved What the fuck? Okay. Those are the jump pads they were talking about hey-ah Not enough energy? but I only fired one arrow Okay. [screams in delight] Come on fuckos [Jack shouts] and a-[shout] Yeah! [Grunt] Slice ’em up! Nice! Do I go with the game? Boom goes the dynamite. I feel like whenever I’m like slicing guys I’m like this. [responding to robot announcer]
oh it should Um.. right. I want to get energy capacity. Wait. Where’s the arrow upgrade? I ain’t seeing it. Block arrows-block arrows-get up Energy capacity. Good for-aim time. That’s it but how do I get them? I can’t- oh I can’t them now ’cause I don’t have enough…. Okay. So I have to get to arrow width first. Okay. I thought it’d be down this tier. I probably should have looked at that before I did anything I hate these guys Whose talking!?! Oh yeah the Emperor dude that’s up there. Ah fuck! There’s arrows coming from everywhere. It’s hard to keep attention on everything that’s going on. Fuck you guys, fuck you guys. Fuck you guys! [grunt] Oh shit he blocked me where’s the arrow dude? Ni-ah fuck. I didn’t kill him [screams] Jesus Christ! Okay you guys need can come over to the fuckin’ saw blades Cause I’m not dealing with your nonsense here we go Here we go. Come on saw blades, come on saw blades. Wreck ’em Wreck ’em like Ralph Nice! It didn’t fuckin’ kill them. Fuck you dude! You only had fuckin’ one leg [mimics arena voice]
Victory [responding to robot announcer]
So do I Spidertron 6000 I want to see him too Fuck that guy [laughs] Shit. I should be getting clones by now Cause I’m going to die stupidly. Every time I die it’s cause I’m not paying attention to shit. [grunt] [grunt] Nice. Nice! Got ’em [shout] Get ‘im Fuck yeah How are you still standing you bastard? Ha..wo- Ah- fuck! Hawoosh! Nice-ness Fuck you! [laughs]
He chopped his fuckin’ head off That was awesome Look at all these spider legs dangling around like a fuckin’ gosh dang-dangler Ha! [screams] Get em! Victory. I chopped his little feet off [giggles] I chopped em off like hooves [responding to robot anouncer]
Nope [responding to robot announcer]
Hell yeah Imma get all the way to the top baby I don’t know how many levels there are. I think there’s like 22 or something This is like five so far Yeah. I’m getting a clone this time Cause I don’t want to die stupidly and then have nothing [responding to robot announcer in low voice]
Me too Fuck you guys. I hate you. I hate you all. Oh God! You just killed your own dude. [laughs] That works for Jack! Please get them Fuckin’ dodgin’ all my shits Oh god this is scary actually. Yaw-god. [laughs] I’ll just go across the pathway then [shout] Dead! Dead is good enough bro Trying to dodge me bro? You fucking asshole. He jumped twice You can’t jump twice. You get one jump and that’s all. [grunt] [grunt] Nice! and a doosh-ker! Where did the other guy die? [responding to robot announcer]
It’s the best level. That was awesome. I had a lot of fun Thank you guys Aim time Time slows down when I aim now [makes a “time slowing down” noise] Oh you use energy just pulling the arrow. I thought you used energy by firing it. Oh that makes sense then. Oh God Oh God! God, God, God This is weird I don’t like this Awe fuck. I’m gonna die on this level I know it. I can feel it. Got ’em. Got ’em. I can feel death coming for my little booter-hole right now. Arrows are the key to victory in this one. Or maybe not I don’t have enough energy I need energy recharge upgrades. Okay and- woosh-ker! Fuck you dude! Fuck off! Yes! Ha! I’m a fuckin’ beast Look at me chopping off his fucking legs Yes! Nice! Come here! Come here you little fucker No. No, God no. Oh God. I just got knocked over. Oh… God. There’s a lot of you! [shout] and a- [shout] and a fuck Okay, okay, okay. Don’t die. Don’t die stupidly. Don’t die stupidly Stay alive! [yells] Frodo! You’re not even dead. Now you are [laughs] [shout] I didn’t make it that far last time. That or this is just a new level. Just look at the legs all hanging around [shout] [laugh] Cause it’s kind of awkward. To slice this way you have to hold- You have to hold “A” or “D” to do it So it makes you move around as you’re swinging. So it gets a little confusing but once you get used to it, it’s okay. [responding to robot announcer]
Watch your back! Bitch! Uh. Energy recharge I need that. I need my arrows to come back even faster. You guys all ready to watch me-you gonna ready to watch me flex? You ready to watch me do? I am the best. [high pitched]
Around [high pitched singing]
nothings ever going to get me down [grunt] and [grunt] Dodge this Oh I don’t like them I don’t like the jet pack ones [yells] No! No! No! Fuck off! Sons of- bitches! Aw shitballs [shouts] [shouts] Fuck! Fuck! [shouts] Yes! Thank you Oh Jesus and Megora Ha! [grunt] Kill ’em I hate it Oh I’m all nervous [yells] [grunt] [laughs] Is that gold level done? [grunt-sigh] I’m all fucking pumped up now. God I almost died there. Those jet pack dudes are scary. Aw shite More recharge. Ah- cause now I can get- how fast is the recharge? Why can’t I even equip my bow? What? I can’t equip my bow Why? Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit I can’t equip my bow. I’m pressing two and nothings happening Ah! Fuck [yells] Go away, go away, go away Just keep swinging. Going in circles and swinging Nice! [yelling through teeth; growling] [shout] Yeah fly that way you fuck Come here No!! I knew I’d die stupidly Now I can use my fucking bow. That’s why I lost that time, because I didn’t have my bow. [shout] See! Immediate victory. I have to get another clone now. [responding to robot announcer]
No it wasn’t shut up Oh Nelly. [laughs] Nice Aw shit Fuck Yeah! [yells] Oh that didn’t slow down time hup ya boya! Boing! I’m just going to fucking stay in the air Oh awesome! That was super cool [shout] shit shit shit Ha! If I just stay up here nobody’s going to get me right? Cause you guys aren’t smart enough to get up here? [laughs] Never mind Never mind Come on that didn’t fucking get you? [shout] Yes! Come on. Come on Come on [laughs] Aw you fucks Come on fuckos [grunt] He fucking deflected it. What a dick. Hate that guy. Yes! Okay. No!! Shit. These guys are so hard. Damn it! If I die now I loose completely. Oh no! Then I have to restart all of this. I don’t wanna do that. Where is he? I need to walk him into the spikes. I think that’s the only way to actually get him. Come on. Come on. It doesn’t even fucking kill him. Jesus. What are you made out of? There we go. Okay. So they can kill him. God-now I have to buy another clone. So you can buy five total clones, per play through. [sighs] Aw God Right. So use environment to your advantage. I’m scared, I’m scared, I’m scared. I’m scared! I’m so scared! [yells] Son of a fucking bitch! Okay. I need to start killing things. Oh my God! Spidertron 6000 Fuck [yells] There we go. There we go. Okay [sob] I killed him! I killed the Spidertron. Fuck yeah dude Can I actually go out back here?
Look at his stupid head lying here. Yeah take that. You fuck. Oh thank God. That was actually really easy to kill him. [yells] Fuck away! Oh yes! Two in one, two-for. Whose still alive? What archer is still alive? Hello? Is this-this thing on? I see you He’s surviving over there on your own Ha! Wait for these sons of bitches to stop You guys suck Okay. Now I can actually buy something else. I don”t need to buy a clone. [sigh] I might actually get another clone. Yeah. I feel like I have enough power to survive for now but I might die from some bullshit. Ow! Scratched my head and now it hurts. Maybe my head’s bleeding -bleeding ugly! Ha, ha. Shit. Oh God. There’s jumpy- dos everywhere. [shout] Oh God. Oh God, Oh God! [yells] Oh shit! I want to get somebody in the air. Fuck! He almost got me. Shit! He’s one of the deflecty-doos. Oh no. Oh no And he’s deflecting all my shit, I should have got kick. I should have got the kick upgrade. Just keep jumping. Keep jumping and keep swinging. I’m bound to hit something eventually. [laughs] [shout] Oh…. I hate this [shout] [yells] Fuck. Shit. Come on! How does he even know where I half the time? Just keep going in circles This is how we do it Yes! I got one of the hard guys Yes!! [laughs] There’s only this piece of fucking shit left. Hello. [laughs] What? [laughs] [pant sigh Oh [responding to robot announcer]
Yeah I am! [responding to robot announcer]
Shut up I need to get kick cause you can knock down the other guys then. There we go. Kick. Cause kick it knocks them down so they can’t block your attacks any more like [shout] Apparently kick plus jet-pack is pretty good. What? Oh jet-pack bots. I’m just going to fire random arrows at you guys Hopefully I hit someone. Nope. I hit- I missed everyone. Wee! [laughs] Wee! [giggles] See you later fuckers [yells] God you guys are fast [shout] Kill each other! That’s what I’m all about. [laughs] Oh- Where are you going bro? Death Town! Level 13 I’m doing good! Those are good adjectives to describe how awesome I am. What?!? What hit me? I did not see anything that hit me that time. I think I got hit by a fucking arrow. Son of a bitch. Is that spider dead? Oh he’ll fucking learn to be in a minute. Come on can you get these guys? Please? There’s one. Fuck! Fuck!! The spider knocked me over and then a bomb, or a-the saw blade blew me up. Killed me. I fucking know. Are both of them going to hit you? Fuck yeah. And your killed by that. Fuck yeah. God, I got so many clones destroyed now. Fuck it anyway. Yeah! Suck it. Hate those guys. Now I have to get more clones. I can only get one more clone I think. And then I’m screwed. What am I going to do? I’m sad now. Wait, we didn’t even get to the big one yet? That’s my last clone. [whispers] Fuck Okay. I’m going to have to be cautious. That’s not a bad spider. Oh I see you guys. I see you fuckers. Oh God. Oh God, oh God, oh God! Come over the fucking spikes. Yes Okay, okay. NO!!! Ooooh-kay. Okay. The big daddy pants are on now. Fucking jet-pack sons of bitches. Shit, shit, shit, shit. Shit! Ga-fuck. Yes! Shitballs. I didn’t kill him like I thought I did. [yells] okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Come at me. Come at me bro. Here we go. Here we go into the fucking spikes. [yells] God! I need to get rid of you. I need to get rid of you! Fucker. Ah-Yes!!! [laughs] [coughs] [responds to robot announcer]
Please don’t for the love of God No!! [moans] God Damn it. Level 16. Oh I got so far! I think there were only twenty-two levels in the whole thing. Ah shit. Anyway, that does it for this episode of “Clone Drone in the Danger Zone”. This game is awesome. It’s really, really fun. I can’t wait to see what upgrades they add to it later on. What powers you can get. I’m sure they’re going to refine the controls and the enemies and all those types of things, and balance it all out. It’s going to be really good. I think it’s really cool anyway. But for now Thank you guys so much for watching this video.
If you liked it punch that like button in the face LIKE A CLONE! And, high fives all around! *wapish* *wapish* Thank you guys. And I’ll see all you dudes, [high voice] in the next video! [outro music plays] [voice cracks] Like a clone. [laughs]

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  1. Our WIFI at my house sucks badly and right at 6:59 Jack said “Now time slows down when I aim!” And then my video started buffering badly. Really Jackaboy you slowed down time :/

  2. The time slow down that’s Zelda stuff when your falling you can pull out your bow and make time slow down you can do it by dodging other peoples weapons and flurry rushing with your sword

  3. What jack learned today:
    In an upgrade tree you need to unlock certain upgrages before you can unlock others

  4. Have a drink every time jack gets the wrong upgrades( or fall in love with the bow for no f*cking reason🤬🤬🤬🤬)
    I did it and got drunk and ended up at my ex’s

  5. you could not equip your bow because you were missing an arm and you need two arms to hold it

  6. jack therse a new laser challenge a wil whatch u playing its not hard actually theres kick noly challenge in side of the laser challenge hope u might have fun

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