How the New Call of Duty Can Save the Franchise
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How the New Call of Duty Can Save the Franchise

August 11, 2019


(chill theme music) (game warfare sounds) – What’s this one, a new Halo? – You literally asked me that
exact question last time, (Mario coin sound effect) and no, it’s Call of Duty. Much more realistic than… You know what, yeah. It’s Halo. I really don’t care anymore. (chuckles)
– You’re kicking ass. This like a tutorial mission or something? – No, actually, I think
it’s one of the last levels. – Seriously, how are you killing
so many people right now? – With robot spiders that
explode in your goddamn face. (laughs)
– That’s awesome. This is way better than
those earlier Call of Duties about the horror and
futility of actual war, and all that learning and crap, empathizing with those
caught in the middle of global conflict? Yuck.
– Alright. If you can let go of any kinda grip on the history of this franchise, or, you know, history, yeah,
I guess it’s pretty fun. It’s like war was hell, but now, thankfully, it’s the future. We have jetpacks and magic grenades, so war’s a freaking cake party. – Oh snap, watch out for the spider bots. – Nah, it’s fine. I have super-cyborg
reflexes or some (bleep). See how slow they go? – So you’re like immortal? – Kinda. I have all these future
gadgets and gun load-outs at my disposal that
pretty much kill anything automatically and with minimal effort. Now I’m remotely hacking an
enemy robot in the next room. Oh! And using it to assassinate
the boss of the game. – This is the boss fight? You’re owning that guy. – Yep. – Wait. Is that Jon Snow? – More like Jon Schmo! – Seriously, is that Kit Harrington? – More like Split Skullington! I’m sorry, yes. Yeah. It’s Kit Harrington. – So your guy is so powerful
that he’s impervious to war? Where’s the challenge in that? – There isn’t one. I mean, it’s mostly just violent
meditation, at this point. Although in a way, I guess
that is a solid commentary on modern warfare. Punching buttons, you know? From the safety of my couch? Watching my drones do the dirty. Totally unintended, I’m sure. – So are you playing the bad guys? Jon Snow must be good, right? – No. No, he’s the big baddie. My side’s the United
Nations Space Alliance who run the galaxy. Oh, so I guess that actually makes sense that we would have the resources
to quell any rebellion. – Your side runs the galaxy? – Yeah. Well, we’re trying. I mean, what happened was, see, a small group of rebels started waging war against our mining colonies. Now I’m flying my
warship planet to planet, snuffing out the resistance. – Okay. So you’re the evil Empire from Star Wars? – What!? No! No, no. These assholes were gonna blow up Geneva. I had to stop ’em. – Yeah, but terrorist tactics or not, your side has all the resources and power and uses it to fly around, easily stifling any attempt by the poor to unionize or rise up. I mean, this series has gone
from you fighting Hitler to you literally upholding
the power structure of a galaxy-spanning republic. That apparently treats
its miners like (bleep). – I think you’re missing
some nuances of the story. – Are you controlling
a Death Star right now? – It’s not a Death Star. It is a ship that fires
high-energy particle beams that incinerate anything in their path. – This is mass genocide. There are families on those ships. – No, there’s not! You don’t bring your kids to space. I mean, yes, actually,
now that I think about it, you do see a baby crib
at a fueling station in an earlier mission, but
that’s just creepy atmosphere. I mean, come on. There’s probably no kids on these ships. These are fighter jets. Will you stop looking at me? I don’t need this, okay? I don’t need your silent judgment from this side of the couch while I’m over here
trying to hold together the very social fabric that
keeps the galaxy from– Oh! Oh god! Damn rebel scum! Must not be allowed to escape! Take it away. Take it away from me. (breathing heavily) Thank you. (laughs excitedly) – Yeah. Do it. – I didn’t say you could play. – Shut up!
– Alright! (strumming guitar)

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  1. I'm requesting one of two viedos from these two
    One being about Cuphead
    The other being about Sonic mainia or Sonic forces

  2. For everyone saying that you have to read between the lines to understand how the title makes sense…. come on, stop giving all the credit to Cracked. They clearly picked the most click-baity title they thought they could get away with. Even though the answer the title can ONLY be inferred from making guesses and reading between the lines.

    If the topic of your video title is never ACTUALLY addressed even once in the video, then it's a SHITTY TITLE.

  3. New cod fucked the Rest out of the franchise, due to Bad Servers and many Problems i already Sold it haha gonna buy bf1 premium again and play that

  4. Cod is for noob who cant play high dexterity games. I bet the cant even pass stage one mario with 1 live, probably will be owned in counter strike

  5. Star Warrrrs, nothing but Star Wars, for you and me!!

    But seriously, why I didn't buy this game, thinking it was hot shit, please 😒

  6. (Looks at controller) You want this, don't you? The win is welling in you now. Take your controller. Use it! The rebels are virtually unarmed. Strike them down! Give in to your win and for purchase weapon load outs. With each passing moment you become more my servant. (Capitalist military industrial complex smiles. :^)

  7. Put "escort mission" in the title! I almost skipped this thinking it was one of those shit shows where all they do is talk about a fan theory they found on reddit for 45 seconds.

  8. I think you mean old call of duty… this shits been out over a year already. where's Roger? he's the only funny person on this channel

  9. I zoned out for a second somewhere in the middle and when I started paying attention to the video again I actually thought he was talking about Halo.

  10. "We want change in cod!"
    adds futuristic stuff
    "What did you do to cod!?"
    goes back to exactly what it was before
    "Oh man this is perfect!"
    I was fine with futuristic stuff.

  11. To all you numbskulls who are complaining about the title being misleading, they're essentially saying that maybe bringing the series back to killing fascists instead of having you play as one might be a good idea. I swear, I don't know why Cracked even bothers with subtlety at this point…..

  12. "I don't get how this explained how the new CoD can save the franchise"

    In case you were wondering why the rest of the world thinks Americans are fucking retarded, this is why.

  13. COD developers are slaves to the empire and their rabbid fans.May be they trolled the hell out of braindead fans.

  14. lol the main faction in this game is the UNSA while the main faction in halo is the UNSC so yah they are so not the same lols.

  15. So, next a scientist for the UNSA will create genetically engineered soldiers to fight the rebels. That will prove handy when humanity is suddenly attacked by a religiously zealous army made up of various races. And they'll call those super soldiers Gladiators. Then come the Gladiator III. Treachery, victory, megalomaniacal computer, etc.
    And also a real time strategy game crammed into the background.

  16. So did they shoot this the same day as the newest After Hours or does Michael just wear a Sriracha shirt all the time? (Or are they secretly sponsored by Sriracha now?!)

  17. Swaim quit in October and this came out in November. . Weird. This is his new content https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

  18. Where have you been? It’s been almost 7 months, you guys still haven’t posted. I’m really worried

  19. Too bad that there aren't anymore episodes of Escort Mission. Would love to see you two talking about the new God of War or even a look back on Last of Us. Wishful thinking, I guess.

  20. COD will die because lack of consistency. It's like HALO now but a new one comes out every 3 months for $65 dollars, meaning most of them have inactive online scenes filled with cheaters. Greed killed COD.

  21. I haven't played this game yet, but the character of noob (not the actor) was in the dark on this too, so I think I'm still justified in saying, a lot of his claims were based on assumptions. Were the rebels really a poor faction? Were UN miners treated poorly? Were those military or civilian vessels being blasted? In addition to that, I feel there were some massive logic holes here. Just because the player is on the side with more resources doesn't mean that their evil. Think of it this way, the Union in the American Civil War had more resources than than the Confederacy, but does that mean that the Confederates were the good guys? What about ISIS? Does the fact that they are a relatively small organization mean that they are the good guys?

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