Sausage Run! [Pear Plays]
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Sausage Run! [Pear Plays]

August 9, 2019

(explosion) (techno music) – [Orange] (laughs) – [Pear] Hey, hey, what is up guys? It is Pear. Most extreme gamer of all time. And, we are playing Sausage Run. Oh my, ow. He’s just (stutters) he’s
got the wacky wobbles. That’s what he’s got. Wacky wobblin’ sausage man. And I don’t want to get crushed, I don’t want to get cut in half. I don’t want to get started on fire, because all of those
things will cause me to, I don’t know, die. So, we don’t want that to happen, okay? Oh, man. I don’t know what happened, how you got here, Sausage, but we’re gonna get you out of here, okay? Oh, geeze. Who is setting up all of the– Okay, frozen obstacles? Does that mean I can just
run as fast as I can? Yeah! Woo hoo! Oh, hot dog’s (yells). That’s (stutters) gonna ruin your day. That is definitely not
gonna feel good to anybody. So, yeah, we’re not gonna do that. You could be all kinds
of different people. That’s cool. Alright, let’s try and
get our sausage friend out of here, again. That was terrifying. I don’t like to be crushed by giant, what is that thing anyway? I suppose it’s just a giant masher. Just makes puree out of anything. Like, literally, anything. You want an old shoe? – [Orange] Hey, Pear! Nyah nyah nyah nyah! – [Pear] Stop it. Okay, I’m sorry about that. I had to pause the game
and get Orange out of here, because he just suddenly
started nyah-nyahing. (exclaims) And, totally ruined it. Ruined it for me, threw me off my game. Whoa, the Knight for 3? 3 turns. Definitely going to do that. So, now that I’m wearing armor,
is that going to help me? A sausage wearing armor. Who doesn’t want to have that? I mean, probably you guys, if you’re trying to eat the sausage that has, you know,
legit knight armor on it. Not gonna be good for your teeth. I’m pretty sure the dentist would be like, no, no, don’t eat that. But, then of course, you’re like, no, I’m hungry. And then you crunch down on it. Bam, you’ve lost 8 teeth, all in just one bite, 8 teeth gone. It’s your fault. It’s your fault. I told you not to do it. I’m telling you not to do it. Especially, ’cause, it’s food. They’re my friends. Oh no! (screams) Oh, the armor does nothing. The armor does absolutely nothing. Doesn’t help one bit. Oh, man, I could be all kinds of things (techno music) (screams) Okay, that was obnoxious. Thanks, thanks for the ad that was three thousand times louder
than the actual game was. It’s just like watching TV. You’re watching TV and
you’re having a good time. You’re watching your favorite
show and having some laughs. You know? You’re watching your favorite
show Everyone Loves Ramen, and then having a laugh, then all of a sudden the ads come on. And it’s like, oh, commercial break. And then it’s (roars). And you’re like, ow, my non-existent ears. Uh, I just blew a non-existent eardrum. That’s no good for anybody. Especially you guys. You actually do have ears. So, man, I feel really bad for you guys. (grunts) Yeah! I was doing that, kind of like, a limbo. You know, I went under it, I wacky wobbled straight back up and grabbed that coin
like nobody’s business. Ooh, I timed that just perfectly. No, no, no. Oh, I hate those things. I hate them. Am I out of time? No, no I’m (exclaims). I’m going too fast. No, not another one. (yells) It goes too fast. I’m like, I’m walking too fast
and the blade is right there. How do I get around it? I have to try and limbo underneath it. But, it doesn’t, he walks too fast and
ends up walking into it. If I don’t do that,
then I walk into anyway. So, there’s literally no way to win. I don’t like the spinning ones. Alright, let’s get this here. Oh, here. Are you serious? Are you serious right now? I limboed underneath (sighs). Yeah, okay. Alright, alright, alright. Oh (grunts). I need to switch to a ninja. That’s the problem. I, okay, now nothing’s
going to be able to get me, because they’re going to be like, hey, where do we slice, we can’t tell, because he’s a ninja, he’s so fast. Yeah, just dodging stuff. I’ll save you, Sausage. We will be together, once again. We will (stutters) I don’t know. We’ll play some board games or something. I don’t know. That (stutters), if we could
get you out of this place, that’s what we’ll do. What’s your favorite board game? Maybe we could play some, we could play some
Pictionary, that’s what. Oh, yes. Now I can actually get hit one time and not have to worry about it. Hopefully I don’t run
into the spinning blades, because those cause a big problem. It really (stutters). See, here we go. See, that was fine. Oh, man, yeah (mumbles). A little Apple-style. I like this, I like this. That makes it even harder
for me to get into. It doesn’t last very long, though. I’d like it to last, at
least, twice as long. Because, I mean, look at how fast that meter goes down. Uh-oh, uh-oh, oh, thank
goodness I had it there. I’m running for it. I’m not stopping. You can’t stop me. Oh my gosh. I think I might win the game. Oh, look at me go. I’m dodging everything. Oh, it just chopped (grunts). (exclaims) Burnt butt. Ooh, who wants some burnt Sausage butt? Not, I, because then that
would kind of make me a cannibal, I guess. Not completely, because I
wouldn’t be eating Pears. Which, definitely would not do that. Holy crap. I would be food eating food. We don’t do that, man. We don’t do that. At least, not our food friends, anyways. Yes, got the buns. Buns for my buns. Got protective buns for my behind. So I can’t get burnt. Well, I can get burnt, but I could get burnt twice now. It’s good if I get burnt once, then my buns fall off, but not my actual my buns. My second layer buns. I don’t know what I’m saying. I’m just trying not to die. That’s what I’m saying. Help me (laughs), help me
save the Sausage (yells), oh no! Aww, come on, I was shrunk. Shrunk-a-dunk. Why didn’t that save me? I couldn’t limbo underneath that. What else we got here? We’re just gonna stick with the ninja. It’s working really well
for me, can’t you see? Ow! (laughs) Under the knife. Yes. Okay, uh, it looks like the best is three hundred forty one. Who got that score? Geez. I’m not going to get
anywhere near close to that. Based on how well I’m playing so far. Sausage, I’m so sorry, I don’t mean to get you burnt and chopped, and smashed and mashed. I don’t want to make you mashed potatoes. Sausage mashed potatoes. Sausage mash? I don’t know. Run! (laughs) That’s what I’m trying to say. Run away. Yes, I’ve got the buns again. The buns for my buns. Do you guys have this game? What’s your high score? Let me know, yeah, oh. Don’t get your booty burnt. (stutters) Make sure not to get crushed
by the giant (squeals). Okay (mumbles), no, no, no. Okay, no, come on. No, seriously, what are you doing? You had three in a row. What is with the spinning knives? We don’t need spinning knives. Where in the world is there
spinning knives like that? Okay. You didn’t even give me a chance. See, now, once you get
up to like a hundred, the screen starts. No. – [Advertisement] The
QuickBooks self-employed. – I don’t care (grunts). Oh, man, ads. Ads everywhere. Always, everywhere, ads. Pretty soon we’re just gonna
have ads all over our bodies. People are going to pay us to get tattoos of different ads. Different companies all over our bodies. Which, people might actually start doing. I would not doubt it. Yeah, who wants a Coca-Cola
tattoo on their butt? Because, Coca-Cola is now paying $1,000 to anyone who puts a Coca-Cola
tattoo on their butt. (stutters) Mark my words,
it’ll happen someday. I promise you. They really have to pay a premium, though, if you’re gonna do it on your forehead. Because, that’s right
there for everybody to see. The butt, only a few people see. Unless, you’re a fruit, of course. Like, I don’t have to (stutters). Okay, I don’t even know
where we are going with this? I, you guys started it. You’re the ones that
started talking about this. It wasn’t me, it definitely wasn’t me. Alright, get out of here. Get out of here Sausage man. No, okay, I thought I was
getting crushed there. That was close. Oh, what? No, now I’m big. I don’t need to be big. (groans) Ooh, that was close. I almost got a mighty fine haircut there. No, no, no. Okay, see, there, again. Once you hit about a
hundred, you walk too fast to be able to get past. Like, just walking normally
you can’t get past anything. And, then, if you try and run fast, you get crushed by stuff. You can’t win. This game is rigged, man. Sausage man, we gotta find a different way out of here. Is there, like, a
sledgehammer or something? We could break through the floor. You drop down, because
this is a bunch of bull. A bunch of bull Sausage. I’m serious, man, this is ridiculous. Yeah, okay, it’s still pretty fun. I mean, not for Sausage. He’s not having a good time, I’m telling you that much right now. He’s got those nice, warm, cozy buns. But, just wait. They’re gonna get slapped
right off of his other buns, and then he’s not gonna be happy. (exclaims) That was close. Yeah, just, look at that. There’s, like, sausages
hanging from the ceiling. T-bone steaks. Aww, man, this is just terrible. This is terrible. Hanging from the ceiling. No, see, again. No, I can’t believe I
actually dodged that one. Yes, frozen obstacles. Go as fast as you can,
that’s the name of the game I live and stream. Ooh, yeah. Oh, got some more buns. Just gonna go fast anyway (laughs). Ow! Ow, that definitely smarts. That’s not gonna do anything for me. That’s (stutters) just terrible. That’s just terrible. I created a sausage mash,
and I did not mean to create a sausage mash. I said I wasn’t gonna do that, I’m sorry Sausage. Oh, now you’re not gonna
play Parcheesi with me, when I get you out of here. Maybe we’ll play Battleship. Do you like Battleship? That’s a fun game. Maybe some Yahtzee! Yeah, who knows? Who knows? It’s gonna be a while, though. I don’t think we’re gonna
get Sausage out of here. Just sayin’, ’cause I’m not
that great at this game. (laughs) That could be an issue. Oh, yeah, frozen obstacles run. (exclaims) Oh, no, oh wow. Wow, did you see that? I grabbed the buns, protected myself, just as the hammer was coming down. Bam, hammer time. No, it’s Pear time. Because you got past the obstacle. Bam, that’s what you do. That’s how you do it,
that’s how you win it. Spin it to win it, as Orange would say. No, oh man, that was close. That was close. Once again, oh you are giant (yells). King Kong size Sausage
couldn’t win the game. Alright, guys. Well, I think that’s it for this time. Thank you so much for watching. Keep living that extreme dream. ‘Til next time, Sausage pants. (techno music)

Only registered users can comment.

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  2. Play Work simulator it's going to be crazy and all you doing is work well not all look people are going to the shoe will I don't know because I have not played the game but I hope it'll be enough for you

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  5. you
    hello miss how are things going on in my opinion of course I have tried everything is going on with it and the rest of my life with

  6. hey pear: nya nya nya nya nya nya nya nya nya nya hahaha nya nya nya hahahaha nya nya i love your channel orange rules nya nya nya nya think of five nights at freddie's

  7. Imma annoy pear nnnnnnanamsncBxs c b c z bc banned craggy txt hobgoblin United TechCrunch Unix outbox icebox read Sega neurotic

  8. Someone make a game where you have to keep killing Pear in order to win and then force Pear to play that game

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