Dylan: What’s that? You’re – you’re breaking up. Carlos: (radio) Don’t you try that
“bad signal” crap with me, Andrews! I spent a fortune on this slipstream,
so you could hear me LOUD and CLEAR. Show’s over. Time to come home. Dylan: I’m ON to something.
Something big. Carlos: (radio) You’re not on to something.
You’re ON something. AI Fragments? Time Travel? A talking BOMB?! Dylan: There’s something else. I’ve been digging around the remains
of Project Freelancer and I – Carlos: (radio) And how in God’s name
did you manage that? Dylan: Well, I’ve been doing it… …literally? And I pieced together a complete
record of their personnel files. I got real names for all the super soldiers. Carlos: (radio) Okay…
How many have you interviewed? Dylan: None. Get this – I checked the names against the
UNSC crime database… …and every single former agent
is either dead or missing. Most of the disappearances
happened since the Reds and Blues… …started their crime spree. They have to be related! Carlos: (radio) It ain’t enough!
It’s actually nothing! You’ve been gone for WEEKS! Show me something that the
people can look at with their eyeballs. Dylan: You’ll have visuals when I finish
tracking down the Reds and Blues. Carlos: (radio) Ohhhh…
No. No. No. No. Noooo, Dylan. I’m putting an end to this nonsense, right now! You get back to the office pronto,
or you’re out of a job. Period. Capiche? End of story! Jax: Oh hey, how’s Uncle Carlos?
He seemed kinda peeved… Dylan: Yeah, he’s peeved. Next time he calls you, please just… …let it go to voicemail.
Don’t transfer to me, okay? Jax: Eh, I hate to kill my babies,
but… okay. Dylan: …What? Jax: My voice mailbox is at capacity
with all my spec scripts. I’ll have to delete some to make room,
but I get it. “Filmmaking is all about killing your babies.” Dylan: Stop saying that. The expression is you have to kill your “darlings.”
Not your “babies.” Jax: Oh, I meant I have to delete
all my ideas about babies. My horror spec:
“Rabies Babies.” My time travel comedy:
“Three men and a Baby Hitler.” My “Look Who’s Talking” reboot about Helen Ke– Dylan: Enough!
God… dammit, Jax! I can’t even hear myself think in this…
blizzard of idiocy. Go take a hike! Jax: But I just wanna help… Dylan: You wanna help?
Here’s how you can help: I need you to climb up that
really tall mountain, right now. All the way up to the tippy top… …which is coincidentally,
really far from me. Jax: Oh, but how does that help? Dylan: Because I need you…
to shoot… establishing shots. Wide shots that we can use to set up
the location at the beginning of our story. Jax: Oh, I don’t know… that’s usually
grunt work for the Second Unit… I’ll have to check with my union rep… Dylan: Quit stalling. Get! Jax: It looks dangerous… [ Bird screech ]
Jax: It looks dangerous… [ Bird screech ]
Isn’t this what CGI is for? Dylan: CGI? Is that what… …Hitchcock would say? …or Carpenter? [ Dramatic Drum Hit ]
…or Hertzog? Jax: Alright, alright, alright,
let’s leave the old Gods out of this. I’ll do it. Dylan: Better make it a time-lapse. Jax: (talking to himself) Oh yeah,
Mom, I haven’t forgotten about you. And Carlos, you sly bastard! Best agent
in the business, ladies and gentlemen. And, of course I have to thank the academy. And, of course I have to thank the academy…? Hello there… [ Suspenseful music starts playing ] Oh, holy crap, they’re here! (radio static) Jax: (nervous) Dylan t- Jax to Dylan,
this is Dylan- No, Jax! Over! [ Answering machine sound ] Mailbox: “We’re sorry, the person you
are trying to reach has disabled communications.” “Please try again at a later time.” Jax: (nervous) Crap, what do I do? Think! “Simmons”: (Offscreen)
Hey, is somebody over there? Jax: …Crap! Jax: Miss Andrews, you turned off your radio! Dylan: My AI assistant needed the channel. I got something… Jax: Ooh, I got something, too!
Let me go first! Dylan: Not now. This is about the Reds and Blues. Jax: Yes, it is! So is mine! Dylan: Can it, Jax! Whatever it is, I promise it’s not as important
as me looking at this computer screen. Jax: I have to point out this type of
scene is very cliché… I talk. You ignore. And meanwhile… …we become surrounded. Dylan: This is what I’m after.
It’s about the Reds and Blues. Jax: Is it about how they’ve surrounded us? Dylan: Damn, it’s not them! These are just dumb requests from the
Gulch prototype for more toilet paper. Another dead end. Jax: Say, “We got company!” Dylan: What?
Jax: Say, “We got company!” Hurry! Dylan: Why? Jax: ‘Cause that’s how action scenes start! [ Gunshot ] [ Ping! ] Dylan: Get cover! [ Gunfire ] Dylan: It’s the Reds and Blues. They’re here! [ More gunfire ] Jax: I know! I’ve been trying to tell you!
I saw them land! Dylan: Did you shoot them?! Jax: Hell no! I abhor violence! Except in my movies, TV shows,
books, video games, graphic novels… Dylan: Did you shoot them with your cameras?!! Jax: Oh, no, the light was terrible. Dylan: The light?! You… imbecile, we need footage! Jax: Well, Hertzog wouldn’t have shot it either, okay? Dylan: Shut. Up. Start. Rolling. Jax: Beeeep! Dylan: We can flee for our lives after we
get the shot. I’m gonna draw their- What’s wrong with your head? Are you hit?! Jax: Shakey cam. Y’know, for action scenes! Makes it look authentic! Dylan: We are ACTUALLY getting shot at! Jax: You’re right, this technique is way played out. Dylan: I’m gonna draw their fire!
You try and get a good look at the shooters! Ready? [ Gunfire ] Dylan: Did you get them?! Jax: No, I tried to snap-zoom, but I missed my focus! Dylan: You’re going to get us killed! Jax: Well, I could say the same to you! [ Gunfire stops ] Dylan: They’re falling back… Jax: But why? Eh… we’re defenseless. [ Thunder ] Jax: Whoa, what is that? Dylan: Thundersnow. Dylan: Thundersnow.
Jax: Great name for a movie. Dylan: This entire valley is
about to get a whole lot colder. Jax: I think I’m ready to get back to the ship now… Dylan: Not before we talk to them. Come on. Jax: Oh, you’re NOT being serious… Jax: Let’s make a deal: Whichever one of us passes out
gets stuffed in a Tauntaun! [ From Empire ] Dylan: CAN IT! THIS WAY! Dylan: Dylan Andrews, Interstellar Daily. Would any of you care to comment on
the string of attacks you’re all being… …held responsible for? Supposedly on behalf of Chorus? “Sarge”: No. Jax: Shit just got real. Dylan: That’s not them. That’s not them! ???: LAVERNIUS TUCKER. [ Super Menacing Background Thunder ] Dylan: What… IS this? Jax: Look’s like our company’s got company! ???: ARE YOU LAVERNIUS TUCKER? “Tucker”: Stop following me, asshole! [ Gunfire ] Jax: Who the hell is that?! Dylan: I have NO idea! Jax: So we should get back to the ship? Dylan: This way! Jax: Oh, that’s just great! Game over, man! Game over!! ???: YOUR ATTACKERS HAVE FLED. IT IS NOW SAFE FOR YOU TO RETURN TO YOUR SHIP. Dylan: Who are you? ???: I AM NO ONE. NOT TO YOU. I AM ONLY SOMEONE TO THOSE I SEEK. AND THOSE I SERVE. Dylan: Who do you seek? ???: LAVERNIUS TUCKER, OF THE REDS AND BLUES. Dylan: That wasn’t them. ???: HOW DO YOU KNOW? Dylan: Their weapons were all wrong, for starters. Sarge always uses a shotgun,
not whatever that was. And Tucker’s never held a
sniper rifle in any records I’ve found. And his voice… ???: THE SEARCH CONTINUES. Dylan: What do you want with them? ???: I SEEK TO SERVE. Dylan: Who do you… serve? ???: WHOEVER I AM TOLD. Dylan: Tell us your name! ???: GOODBYE. Jax: Weird name. “Hello Goodbye!” “You’re leaving? Why no Goodbye, I just got here!” Why haven’t you told me to “zip it”? Dylan: Zip it. This changes EVERYTHING. Kaikaina was right. Those aren’t the real Reds and Blues… Someone’s been impersonating them. But why? And who? Jax: I bet it’s clones! OR, evil robot versions! OR, a transporter mishap? Dylan: That means they’re not
attacking the UNSC for Chorus… They have some other agenda entirely. Oh, this is too good! Jax: So uh, where we going next boss? Dylan: “We”? Jax: Uh, yeah, “we”! Partner. “We”! Dylan: You missed a critical shot out there. In my book, that’s unforgivable. Jax: But I DID push you out of the way of a bullet. Dylan: I have to concede that is technically true. Jax: Even-stevens? Dylan: Let’s see how Chorus goes. Jax: Chorus? What’s Chorus? Dylan: The last stop on our tour. The planet of Chorus. Jax: Whoa! Chorus sure has a lot of spaceships. Dylan: Those don’t belong to Chorus… That’s the UNSC First Fleet. It’s a blockade. Jax: Yeah, they don’t look too friendly. Dylan: No… they don’t…